THE PROCREATIVE ROAD LESS TRAVELED – THE EXCEPTION THAT BECOMES THE RULE

It was interesting that I started writing this series and lo and behold Doug Wilson posts this. I want to take a moment to critique Wilson here on this subject. Now I want to say that I highly respect Wilson, and will be the first to admit that I am not worthy to hold Wilson’s intellectual jockstrap as it were. He is a clear thinker amidst a morass of muddled theology and philosophy, and he is not afraid to pursue the truth and change his opinion as a result of that pursuit no matter what the cost. And I agree with most of this article; however, I do have a few quibbles.

There is this argument in some circles that says children are indeed a blessing, and a couple should have as many children as God blesses them with, but only as long as they can raise those children well. Wilson falls into this line of thinking for reasons I will not go into here at this time. I think that this is a cop out, and an exception that can very quickly swallow the rule.

I apologize for the structure of this, but I am a contracts attorney (among other things) and that is how I have been trained. :(

1. Scripture says that children are a blessing and a gift from God - period. There is no caveat to the various statements made in Scripture that say anything about the ability to raise a child well as a litmus test for having more children.

2. God never gives us more than we can handle at the time. A trial is never placed upon us to destroy us, how much more so one of his blessings. He has created us and knows exactly what we can and cannot handle. He may well bring us to the breaking point and He may give us well more than we ever thought we could handle, but His grace is sufficient for us. If we fail in anything that He has given us be it trials or blessings it is never due to our ability, for our ability is directly tied to His ability, but only due to our stubborn refusal to obey Him and His principals. Therefore OBEY HIM and you will handle what He gives you.

3. He brings trials and blessings into our lives to stretch and grow us into the people He wants us to be, this is part of the blessing of children. One refuses this stretching, this sanctification, to one’s determent.

4. The Scriptures do say that children can be a curse to their parents if they are not raised well.

5. This is placed in Scripture not to warn us about having more children than we can handle, for we can handle as many children as God gives us, but to warn that it is our obligation to in fact raise our children well. In other words Proverbs 10:5 is not a warning to parents of the risk of having too many. It is an injunction to parents to do their job.

6. A well raised child should never be defined in terms of the financial costs.

(a) We live in a materialistic culture, and it is difficult for us to view things from God’s perspective. What we really need and what we think we need are two completely different things. God owns the cattle on a thousand hills and He has promised that the children of the righteous will never go hungry. The thought should never be, I know I can’t be righteous so I should only have X kids. No the biblical injunction is to BE RIGHTEOUS! Or be as righteous as it takes to raise the children that God gives you.

(b) To raise a child well is to teach them the faith and build character in their lives. These things cost nothing monetarily. Children do not need the latest gadgets and gizmos. They do not need to live in a McMansion. They don’t need the latest fashions. They do not even need to go to college (Which is a complete scam, but that’s another post.). They definitely don’t need to go to the latest and greatest classically educated private school. Contrary to what a lot of people think, none of these things are essential. Now God knows what you need and He will provide those things to you and for any child He gives you. Consider the lilies of the field . . .

7. The problem is that with all the pressures of our lives, if we allow ourselves this false exception, we will be tempted to take our eyes off of Christ and we will begin to see the storm and all the waves, and the exception will become our excuse and then quickly will become the rule, for it’s in our nature to desire to run when God wants to stretch us.

To be continued . . .